Speak to most mothers about their pregnancies, years later, and they’ll tell you that being pregnant was one of the most wonderful experiences of their lives. If you had spoken to any of those mothers back when they were actually pregnant, you may have come away with a slightly less positive image. Pregnancy causes significant physical and psychological changes in the expectant mother’s body. She has little control over the physical changes; but, when she knows what to expect, she can learn to adjust to the inevitable psychological changes.

The Rapidly Changing Hormonal Balance

Expectant mothers and their spouses recognize early on in the pregnancy that the mother’s behavior begins to change. Her moods swing up and down apparently without any outside causes. These mood swings, in most cases, are perfectly normal and will pass. The expectant mother’s body is undergoing tremendous hormonal changes as her system prepares itself to handle the creation of a new life. It’s not unusual, during this period, for expectant mothers to be filled with joy about pregnancy at one minute and crying uncontrollably in the next.

It’s important that both mother-to-be and her partner understand that these emotional changes are normal responses to physical changes. Both must learn to recognize and deal with the downward mood swings, and enjoy the times when the mood is elevated. As the body adjusts to its new role, the mood swings will become less frequent. As long as both the spouses understand the reasons for the mood changes, there will be no guilt or hurt feelings as a result.

Maintaining a Positive Self-image

The early pregnancy is time of great joy. The expectant mother radiates a recognizable glow. Friends and family heap praise in abundance. Self-esteem is elevated by all the recognition. This self-image fades quickly, however, when the expectant mother’s body begins to exhibit the inevitable major changes. The mother sees her body as becoming fat and unappealing. Her normally graceful walk becomes a waddle. Her upright posture changes to a slight backward-leaning stance, compensating for the baby’s protruding weight. It’s important for the expectant mother to recognize that, more than any other time in her life, she is exhibiting the true strength and beauty of her womanhood. This is also the time when the spouse should exhibit loving support, saving the well meaning humor for after the baby’s birth.

Worrying about Labor

Especially for a first child, mothers-to-be become concerned about the delivery experience. Older mothers will talk about the difficulties of their labor experience. While these reminiscences are based on truth, like fishing stories, they often become exaggerated. Don’t let these stories make you fearful.

Attend a birthing class with your spouse. Learning the facts about labor and practicing special breathing techniques will help you to feel confident about the delivery experience. The more you know, the less anxious you will feel. Most women who participate in birthing classes, approach labor with knowledge and confidence that enables them to participate actively and positively in the delivery without fear.

Will My Baby be Healthy?  Will I be a Good Mother?

It’s normal, during pregnancy, to find that your pleasant thoughts about the great things that you will do with your baby are often mixed with fears about your baby’s health. “Will my baby be normal?” is a typical concern. The best that any expectant mother can do is to visit her doctor regularly, follow a healthful diet, and keep physically fit.

Expectant mothers also worry about their maternal abilities after the baby comes home from the hospital. The mere fact that you are concerned about how you’ll care for your baby is a sign that you will be a caring parent. From the time you first realize that you are pregnant, you begin to study all that you can about early child care. Knowledge builds confidence.

If you are fortunate to have a family that provides a good support network, child care help and advice will be there when you need it. Some mothers join groups of other new mothers who may share the delight of breast feeding or simply provide support for one another during the baby’s early years. Lifelong friendships are often created in these support groups.

When Baby Becomes Family

When the baby arrives safely into your home, you will have experienced the most important function of womanhood. What was only recently a part of you, is now a member of your family. You’re no longer an expectant mother; you are a mother in fact. The baby that once depended solely upon your body for its well being is now a member of a family with both you and your spouse providing needed love and care.

All of your concerns about the baby’s health, labor, the delivery process, and your child care abilities are history. Your body is your own again, and your self-esteem has quickly returned. There will continue to be challenges, but they will be new ones that will now be shared with your spouse.

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